The Gallagher Factor

Get the Sitar

2004-09-22T15:33:00.000-07:00

10. . . 9. . . 8. . .

A Look Back At - Kylie Minogue's Body Language

2004-09-21T01:06:00.000-07:00

I think I'm going to have to change the side-bar, because this clearly 'slipped my mind' while I was doing it.

A lot of people have the WRONG opinion when it comes to this album. As a quick guide...

Right & Wrong Opinions to Have On 'Body Language':

Wrong: 'This album is shit'

Right: 'This album is awesome'

Thankfully Stu has the right opinion (and thus won't need to be punished), as he was pleased to hear that Kylie is 'creeping up on you like a freak in the fast lane' on one song. Be like Stu, and love it as well.

Lost on the back roads?

2004-09-20T12:24:00.000-07:00

STILL no sign of Stu...

A Look Back At - Gareth Gates 'Go Your Own Way'

2004-09-20T04:53:00.000-07:00

Boy, this is really turning into the classic albums series.

I can't read the title of this album without getting the Fleetwood Mac song stuck in my head, and singing You can go your own way!...go your own way. And that's just ONE great thing about it.

Another is that there are two cds - Double! Yes, it was a packaging move perhaps designed by WOMP himself. Whatever the case, whoever thought of it clearly knew that Double The CDs = Double The Entertainment.

CD1 was 'Night' and CD2 was 'Day'. Forever, we will be confused as to why the heck 'Sunshine' was included on disc one, the 'Night' side. One thing we will never be confused about though, was how great it is. Whether it's the Kumar's comedy stylings on 'Spirit In The Sky', the touching ballad 'Say It Isn't So' or the bonus track - 'Unchained Melody (Remix)' this album was hit, after hit, after HIT.

(In all serious, 'Skeletons' and 'Lies' were good tracks)

Hayley Does Lulu

2004-09-19T21:29:00.000-07:00

We're going for Hayley tonight, as she is banging out a bit of Lulu's 'To Sir With Love'. It's one of our favourite songs ever, and very appropriate for Hayley. They are, after all, the same person, as my brilliant paint-shopping would imply. No, they really are very similar...I don't think I fully 'captured' it.

Meanwhile, why not take a visit to the World's only Lulu fansite, created by myself, 3 years ago? (You're probably going to want to bookmark that).

Summer Lovin'

2004-09-19T19:49:00.000-07:00

Neighbours writers have obviously cottoned onto the fact that we just can't get enough of the Summer's love interest storylines. Because they just.keep.coming.

I'd resigned myself to suffering through the 'Summer gets a crush on Jack' storyline, but then - a twist was 'thrown in'! When Jack muttered the eternal words:

'Too bad I'm her uncle now'

This was of course followed by 'Because she'll be a real looker in a couple of years', which meant that he was quite SERIOUS.

Ewwwww! And, bonza! That was certainly unexpected. I wonder where this storyline is going to go...

A Look Back At - Hilary Duff's Metamorphosis

2004-09-18T21:23:00.000-07:00

What better way to kick of the 'A Look Back At' series, but with an album by our Patron Saint of So Yesterday, Hilary Duff?

Let's start by looking at a review:

'An object lesson in fitting great songwriting into experimental production and genre play, this is also a record whose influence extends far beyond'

That was really a review of The Beatle's Revolver album, but I think it fits perfectly in this case too. I mean, Metamorphosis ticks all the boxes:

Great songwriting

Experimental production

Genre play

Influencial

It also contains one of the greatest songs of all time, The Math, which is like Life Mechanics for mathematicians.

'If you can't do the math, then get out of the equation...is it a minus or a plus...nothing adds up...'

And what about the title? Appropriate or what? Hilary was literally 'metamorphosising' right in front of our eyes and ears with this album, as she left the Lizzie McGuire Show to record her debut masterpiece.

Lastly - inspiration was the order of the day when this album was recorded. 'Just listen to you heart, and go baby go' Hilary ordered us, as she asked the world Why Not? On this album, she took a crazy chance, and she did a crazy dance.

2003 - revisited!

2004-09-18T17:28:00.000-07:00

Who doesn't miss the great year 2003? I've personally been taking a visit back in time lately, listening to some of the music we loved last year.

When I think of the great music of 2003, I think of:

- Hilary Duff
- Girls Aloud
- Tatu
- Dead Or Alive's Evolution CD
- Liz Phair
- American Life

(Was Neon Nights out last year? I can't remember. That was good too though.)

Anyway, point was - 2003 was excellent for some great obsessions. So, through a 'series' of upcoming posts, we are going to look back at some of the greatest albums and acts that set our engines racing all those months ago! Exciting? Yes!

And fear not, because this is not just a simple trip down memory lane, or a look back through archives - this is an objective examination of the year 2003. You can expect:

The re-writing of history

New evaluations of the 'best' albums of last year

Many great 'blasts from the pasts'

Some surprises!

So let's get going!

PS. A very warm welcome as well, to the colour purple.

STOP!

2004-09-17T17:22:00.000-07:00

I am SO sorry for the overwhelming shitness of this place lately. I don't know what's wrong...I just seem to have nothing to post, ever. I've realised today just how bad the situation has gotten, so I've been making some moves to fix the situation. I've been looking at other blogs for some good ideas to steal, and I've ALSO got some good ideas of my own!

LATER TODAY - We'll be back in business!

Detective Stu Investigates...

2004-09-15T21:01:00.000-07:00

...my disappearance from Neighbours!

It's the case that needs to solved! And there's only one man for the 'job' - me!

It's time to question my first witness!

Stu: So have you noticed that I have not appeared on screen for about 3 weeks?
Crystal: I most certainly HAVE. What's going on, do you think?
Stu: I have no idea. It doesn't make much sense, does it? I mean, there's plenty I could be doing. I could be patrolling the area...starting new cults, anything.
Crystal: They're probably just resting you until the next one of your trademark great storylines.
Stu: That's true. And also a great clue. I guess this case is just about solved!
Crystal: So, what's your verdict on the new lesbian ~~character~~ student at Erinsborough High, Lana?
Stu: Do you want the police perspective, or the Life Mechanics one?
Crystal: Hmmm...I think I'll have the police one.
Stu: She's arrested my heart, that's for sure.
Crystal: What would the Life Mechanics one have been?
Stu: I would have said she's speeding down the highway to greatness.
Crystal: Have you actually met her?
Stu: No. But I've heard about her from Serena.
Crystal: Why are you hanging around with Serena?
Stu: Because she's awesome.
Crystal: Ok. I better let you get back to work then, Stu. Bye!

Well - another case solved! I've been off-screen because I'm getting ready for another drive down the road of important plots! And I've been filling in my time hanging out with Serena! Case closed!

It's all part of The Masterplan (Part two)

2004-09-12T18:21:00.000-07:00

I'm tipping Marty to go tonight.

If he does, then the plan is REALLY falling into place. And I'll be very frightened.

Chart Attack!

2004-09-12T18:17:00.000-07:00

Congratulations Misdemeanor on debuting at number one!

And well done also, to our favourite comedy artist Selwyn, on a fantastic #28 debut.

Cameron Adam's Boomin' Review

2004-09-09T22:08:00.000-07:00

'Home grown bling king $elwyn went from chart frontline to human punchline in less than 12 months. Now, after a few years in the urban wilderness, he's resurfaced. On Boomin he funks things up but despite a great baseline there's no killer hook. The hater-baiting B-side Boomin and Bangin (which $elly wrote) is actually much better than the A-side. But we need to know: does $elly still have his lucrative Goldmark bling sponsership deal?'
2.5 Dogs

Ha, '$elly.' Excellent work Cameron.

Misdemeanor Higgins was also the very proud recipient of 4 Dogs.

It's all part of The Masterplan

2004-09-06T23:23:00.000-07:00

I'm tipping Angie to go tonight.

If she does then it will be BRILLIANT, as this was our exact plan.

Edit: EXCELLENT.

'And if I listen to, the Sound Of White...'

2004-09-05T05:29:00.000-07:00

RIGHT. Attention 'musicians'! - You can all stop trying right now. Because the perfect album has been made, and there's no use attempting to top it, ever.

SO. EXCELLENT.

Stu says it's hitting top gear, I say it's a five dog classic, Cameron says it's her own album of very own personal wonderwalls and WOMP says it's double as good as anything he's ever heard before. It's shooting hoops, it's a touchdown, it goes to eleven, it travels down the road to success, and it's the BEST ALBUM EVER. Who knew? (WE DID, actually. Which is surprising.)

Worst Song Ever?

2004-09-05T01:01:00.000-07:00

Geri Halliwell - Ryde It

'He's getting jiggy with it, but all I want to do is vogue'? No, Geri.

Plus, I'm so tired of these Can't Get You Out Of My Head 'pastiches'. As Stu would say, that car left the garage two years ago. Think of something new, please.

BEST SONG EVER?

2004-09-03T08:10:00.000-07:00

Well, I was wrong about that one. Radio is AWESOME.

WORST SONG EVER?

2004-09-02T20:10:00.000-07:00

I really thought going in an 'electo' direction was going to be a good idea for Robbie Williams but I've just heard 'Radio' and it is quite terrible. Maybe it will grow on me, I guess, so I won't judge it too harshly. After all 'EVER' usually only means 'at this second in time' and there IS a '?' at the end.

The video is on Rage tonight, incidentally. Maybe that will 'improve' it.

Pop Laws with Stu & The Police

2004-08-31T18:04:00.000-07:00

Arrest your hearts - we're back to solve pop's problems the legal way! Every breath you take, every move you make, we'll be watching you! (YOU MIGHT SAY).

Today's number one pop suspect is, Selwyn:

Ok, after serious inspection of this video clip, I discovered an undercurrent of law 'references' that I failed to pick up on the first time.

Firstly, the clip starts with Selwyn 'tagging' a wall with his name. GRAFFITI. That is a serious misdemeanor.

But after the cops chase Selwyn, he escapes into a club, and sings the line:

'We ain't doing nothing wrong or criminal,
We're just Boomin'

Sorry, but last time I checked VANDALISM is a crime. And then, disgracefully, some of the police start dancing with Selwyn! I don't recognise any of them from the Erinsborough Police Force though, luckily.

So, what advice do I have for Selwyn, about how to get back on track on the legal road of success? Well I say, great, have a song that says you aren't doing anything criminal. THAT I approve of. But don't contradict yourself by damaging public property at the beginning of the song. Otherwise, 'Boomin' is an EXCELLENT song and it will be a crime if it misses the top ten.

Go Emelia!

2004-08-29T22:55:00.000-07:00

If Australian Idol is a little bit like the race of life, then Emelia is in pole position to win it! But first, she must qualify in the top three positions tonight. We really want her to, because she is awesome and revs our engines RIGHT UP.

Unfortunately, she is singing an Alicia Keys song. STUPID. She may as well put the brakes right on! Because that's definitely putting her in the slow lane, and will probably result her pulling up at a red light.

Marty knows how to hit top gear though. He is strapping on his seat belt, checking the review mirror and racing off by singing Somewhere Only We Know!

WHO WILL CROSS THE FINISH LINE FIRST? It's engines go!

Boom Boom!

2004-08-28T17:39:00.000-07:00

We've finally caught Selwyn's new clip! The Bling King IS BACK!

We've enjoyed the Selwyn saga for a long time now. He's one of those acts that permanently has their foot to the floor and is always picking up speed. But has Selwyn ever taken a wrong turn? Let's just travel a little way back down the Selwyn road to find out...

Selwyn's Bumpy Road To Success:

2001:

Selwyn is a shy and non-confident contestant on Popstars 2. Taken under the wing of one of the judges though, Selwyn survives the early rounds to make it fairly far in the competition

Selwyn narrowly misses out on being in (So So) Scandal'us

But it turns out this was a good thing! Selwyn gets a record deal anyway and releases the catchy single 'Buggin' Me'

Cameron Adams likes it a lot!

As (So So) Scandal'us reverse their way right out of the charts, Selwyn revs up his engine and overtakes them

2002

It's time to hit 3rd gear as Selwyn releases the smash hit single 'The Way Love's Supposed To Be'

And then...

Selwyn releases a cover of Hall & Oates 'Rich Girl'

With...some added lyrics. Most notably:
'It's all about the - Bling Bling!
Diamonds, pearls and Benjamins'

Cameron Adams re-names him the Bling King, and the teasing COMMENCES.

In an interview with Smash Hits, Selwyn explains what bling bling and 'Benjamins' are to the naive readers, and argues that he couldn't very well sing about aussie things like hanging out at BBQs, 'sipping VBs'

The first Selwyn DVD is released

In his review of it, Cameron Adams calls it 'The perfect Christmas present. For your worst enemy.'

2003:

Selwyn Dollars become the unofficial currency of the 2003 Aria awards

'The Way Love's Supposed To Be' surfaces on the Songs Heard In The Coffee Shop soundtrack

Mark Holden announces to an unsuspecting Levi: 'Move over Selwyn, Delwyn and Belwyn, there's a new Fresh Prince in town!'

Levi does NOT seem to take this as a compliment

Meanwhile, Selwyn seems to have disappeared COMPLETELY.

2004

Boomin' is released! It's back on the highway of chart success for Selwyn, we predict!

And right here - all the Selwyn news AS IT HAPPENS!

What year are we living in again?

2004-08-27T20:10:00.000-07:00

From the Rage website...tonight's playlists...

Have we put the gear stick into reverse and driven back in time to 1994? Are Rage having Top Secret Oasis Week? [[ Because that would be great.]]

I'm guessing this has something to do with the 10th anniversary re-release of Definitely Maybe...but we didn't know Rock 'n' Roll Star was getting a SINGLE re-release. I MORE than approve though, because it has the classic lyrics:

'I'll take my car, and drive real far'

That's a line I definitely connect with.

It's time to accelerate!

2004-08-27T17:44:00.000-07:00

Well SOME people, hilariously enough, are unhappy that I am the solo passenger in this vehicle at the moment. (Thank you very much though to Hannah for giving me the green light and waving me through some heavy traffic).

It's quite simple, really. Cameron Adams has taken some kind of 'holiday' from HiT it appears, so Crystal is taking a holiday as well, until he returns. WHO KNOWS how long this will be for. But don't worry, because I've taken control of the steering wheel for the time being!

First Order Of Business:

Delta's return to Neighbours

You probably will have noticed that after every ad for Neighbours these days, there is a special announcement that 'Delta returns...on September 6'. Now, I like to think that this is just giving people prior warning, but WHY are Channel 10 trying to keep viewers away then? If I was running things, like I should be, I would be keeping this fact a secret, or at least changing the dates by a week.

Delta, or "Nina" as I like to call her, is a curse on everything as we know. And most notably, she killed my best friend, the WOMP.

So, to balance things out...WOMP returns...on August 28.

(ie - tomorrow! Can you WAIT for the great jokes to begin again?)

On The Solo Road To Success

2004-08-25T21:36:00.000-07:00

Well, apparently Crystal has quit the internet for good. I've read HiT today, and I can understand why.

So I don't know if it's just going to be me here from now on, driving down various roads and solving mysteries...I could always get WOMP back?

Detective Stu: Case Continued!

2004-08-22T22:24:00.000-07:00

Previously, on 'Detective Stu'...

Stu: Well now it's time for you to fear MY methods!

Theme Song Plays
...So travel down the Road Of Success,
Come to the detective who knows best...

Stu arrives at Ben Cousins house.

Knock knock

Ben: Hello?
Stu: Thank Godness! I need to borrow your magnifying glass.
Ben: Hold up one minute. No. I don't lend it out.
Stu: BUT BEN! That's why I've come to see you! I've lost my own one, and I desperately need to borrow yours.
Ben: Hmmm...no, I don't think so.
Stu: Well then, how do you suppose I'm going to find Geri Halliwell's missing horse?
Ben: Geri's missing her horse?! Oh God...do you have any suspects?
Stu: I have one.
Ben: Missy Higgins?
Stu: NOW I HAVE TWO.
Ben: Look Stu, I'll let you borrow the magnifying glass on one condition.
Stu: What's that?
Ben: I can be your side kick.
Stu: No way.
Ben: Ok, see ya later then. Good luck solving the case without it!
Stu: Sigh. Alright then...you can come along and help me out.
Ben: Woohoo! Is it time to hit the road then?
Stu: Yes. I think it's time we kicked this case into overdrive.
Ben: I agree.

Ben and Stu travel along in the car

Ben: Where are we going?
Stu: We're off to question Melanie C.

To be continued...

Next time, on Detective Stu:
Ben: What is that horrible screeching noise?

Misdemeanor

2004-08-22T17:31:00.000-07:00

Hmmm...I've just realised the post below is only going to increase the arrivals here for 'Missy Higgins MP3'. As is that. And it won't be able to stay up the top anyway. Perhaps it was a bit pointless.

Stu:Um...hello.
Crystal: What the hell is it Stu?
Stu: I just wanted to say, I don't think I like Misdemeanor Higgins.
Crystal: Why not??
Stu: Well...it's her name, isn't it? Misdemeanor.
Crystal: A misdemeanor isn't that serious though. It's not like her name is Felony Higgins...
Stu: I guess not. Still feel like I should arrest her or something though.
Crystal: The only law she's broken is the law against good music.
Stu: There's no law against good music.
Crystal: Well then she hasn't broken any laws. Has she?
Stu: Still think I should keep my eye on her.

A Special Announcement:

2004-08-22T05:52:00.000-07:00

Right, we get a google referal here on average every 20 minutes for 'Missy Higgins Scar EP download'.

IT COSTS $4 DOLLARS AT K-MART.

GO AND FUCKING BUY IT.

For Pete's Sake

2004-08-21T19:57:00.000-07:00

Ok, I hate Pete Murray again. He is not worth 5 Wheels Stu! He is worth minus Wheels!

Last night he 'guest programmed' Rage, and he was so freaking BORING. Before every 3-4 songs or so, you are allowed to talk about the clip that is about to be shown, and you are supposed to either:

a)Play it totally cool, (ie, 'Yeah...this is a clip by [____]... It's pretty cool')
or
b)Tell an amusing anecdote about your relationship with the song. If you are in a band, you may have some 'banter'.

But Pete managed to be the opposite of both those things. He was patently uncool and completely uniteresting.

From what I can remember, he told us that:

- He saw the Sunnyboys live on the Gold Coast - once!
- It wasn't the original line-up though! (unfortunately!)
- Powderfinger are 'probably' one of Australia's best bands!
- It took him a little while to get into The Strokes!
- He was skeptical of the hype!

At least now we know that Pete is unwilling to get into acts when he is skeptical of their hype though. I wonder how he is feeling about the upcoming tour with Missy Higgins...he is probably quite skeptical of all her hype. It will probably take him a little while to get into her, I would guess. He is quite wary, Pete.

(NB: Rage guest progammers are never that interesting, in all fairness. I was just in the mood for some Pete Bashing. And he was more boring that the average presenter.)

Stu Reviews Misdemeanor Higgins First EP

2004-08-21T09:13:00.000-07:00

It's no mystery - Missy Higgins is a star! We've tracked down her debut EP for a test drive, to see if she's spinning out of control, or steering her way down the smooth roads of success.

Greed For Your Love is already a favourite of mine - it's often played in the Coffee Shop! It's guilty - of being great! Falling and All For Believing kick the show right into overdrive, and pump up the gas for some tunes that really hit top gear.

And I see that The Special Two has already been crowned BEST SONG EVER ---->
I won't have to make any arrests for that - because it's a legal fact!

Five Wheels

Detective Stu: Episode One

2004-08-21T07:12:00.000-07:00

Hi, I'm Stu! Now the star of my own spin-off detective series!

Let's hit the theme song!

Theme Song To 'Detective Stu':

'If there's a quarrel that needs solving,
Or a mystery that's involving
His door's ever revolving!
It's Detective Stu
That's who.

So, travel down the Road of Success,
come to the detective who knows best,
If there's a crime then he won't rest!
It's Detective Stu
That's who'

Well, life has certainly changed, for me, Stuart Parker-Gallagher. I've left the Erinsborough Police Force, left Erinsborough...left that life behind for good. Now, in a mysterious location, I've set up my own private old fashioned detective agency. I'm just keeping it real, solving crimes they way they should be solved. I'm just going to have to make a phone call to an old friend first, I think...

Bring bring!
Crystal: Hello?
Stu: ...hello. It's Stu.
Crystal: What's the matter Stu! You sound worried! Don't tell me you're stuck in first gear?
Stu: No, actually, I'm here at the GF...
Crystal: Finally! I noticed you mucking around in some kind of costume yesterday, but I'm glad you're back to normal now. So, are you policing the area, or dishing out some helpful metaphors?
Stu: That's what I wanted to talk to you about...You see, the thing is, I've left the Erinsborough Police Force...
Crystal: Oh my goodness! Why?
Stu: I was disillusioned with their modern methods of crime solving.
Crystal: ...ok.
Stu: I've decided to start my own old fashioned detective agency.
Crystal: I see. Did I approve this?
Stu: No...but it's ok! I'll still be able to give popstars advice, and also solve crimes. My two skills combined!
Crystal: Stu, it's just that...I hate to break this to you, but unless you've also traveled back in time, I don't think anyone is going to require your services.
Stu: Well, with all due respect, I think you're wrong...there's a market out there for popstars who want their mysteries solved with an old fashioned twist. I don't question your methods, do I?
Crystal: But that's because you fear them, and you always have.
Stu: Well now it's time for you to fear my methods!
Crystal: Stu! What has...
Stu: Sorry! Got a call coming through! Speak later!
Crystal: Stu!
Hangs up

Stu: Hello, Stu's Detective Agency!

Stu: Geri! Do you have a quarrel that needs solving?
Geri: No, but I do have a mystery that's involving...

(Geri relates the mystery to Stu...)

Stu: OH MY GOD.
Geri: Stu, can you solve the case?
Stu: I'll certainly try! I'll just grab my magnifying glass, and then I'll take off, to hunt for clues...
Geri: Please hurry Stu!

Stu takes off to Ben Cousins house.

To Be Continued...

Next time, on Detective Stu:
Stu: I think it's time to kick this case into overdrive.
Ben Cousins: I agree.

2004-08-19T06:09:00.000-07:00

Hit? More Like The Oasis Gazette!

2004-08-19T05:36:00.000-07:00

Anyone else notice an extreme preoccupation with Oasis in Today's HiT? First there was the Killers interview by CA.

He askes the question:
Is it true you were obsessed with Pet Shop Boys and Depeche Mode but had a rock epiphany watching Oasis?

Four questions later, the subject has drifted off Oasis, so Cam asks, completely irrelevantly:

Have Oasis lost it?

Next we move on to the feature story, Cameron's article on The Prodigy.

Number of mentions of:
Liam: 7
Noel: 8
Oasis: 3

I mean, come on Cameron. Who else mentions the members of the Gallagher family quite so much? It's a little bit over the top.

More Reasons To Love Daniel

2004-08-19T02:55:00.000-07:00

Millsy: Daniel, what song are you singing tonight?
Daniel: Um, Stop by the Spice Girls.

So what, he's writing his own jokes now?

(Incidentally, the rest of that convo went:
Daniel: No, Rock DJ by Robbie Williams.
Millsy: Excellent choice!

Yes WELL DONE Millsy.)

EDIT!:

Later on...
Interviewer: So, do you think you can find some middle ground between classical and Robbie Williams?
Daniel: No, I think I'll just keep getting more and more ridiculous.

THAT'S THE SPIRIT!

Where Is Stu, I Wonder?

2004-08-17T20:23:00.000-07:00

After he quit the LP in a tantrum over not having his own account, I invited him to join me here on the very day we opened. He even has a profile and everything. (Though one look at that tells me he still hasn't undergone the correct name change). Come on Stu! What's taking you so long? We need your good advice around here again!

***********
Meanwhile, I've recived a postcard from Africa. Damon is coming home, and he's ready to dock into his Habour once more...

When he rocks the mike, he rocks the mike right.

2004-08-16T23:25:00.000-07:00

I'd forgotten this great quote from Inside Idol:

'Daniel has a very close relationship with his grandmother, they've been performing at weddings together for a few years.'

You really can't make this shit up. Anyway, it's Extreme Daniel Appreciation Mania around here, and Chris is working overtime to Daniel-o-Vate the Idol Liz. Meanwhile, if the tour goes ahead, it's going to require a behind-the-scenes documentary and a great promo poster:

Also, I hope the remake of 8 Mile, staring Daniel, is going ahead.

Classical Rap - The Daniel Belle Tour

2004-08-16T06:44:00.000-07:00

Yes, it's Daniel Belle Mania you may have gathered. For Aussies, you already know the Daniel Saga, but for anyone else, the short story is that Daniel is a clasically trained, well 'clasical', singer, who was advised by the judges to be more 'pop'. Taking this advice to the extreme, he performed 'Rock DJ' complete with highly questionable cockney rap. HOW HILARIOUS.

In conjucture with these guys, we've come up with the perfect Daniel Belle Concert Tour. I really came up with all the best bits though, so I think I will publish the fantastic ideas here.

'Music For The Masses' - Daniel Belle Live.

Classical interpretation of 'Can't Touch This' plays. Daniel enters the stage dressed in shiny baggy pants and dark sunglasses. Announces over the mike:

'Sound the bell, school's back in SUCKERS!

Why is this particularly good? Yes, Daniel's last name is Belle. But I digress...

Can't Touch This morphs into The Streets - Fit But You Know It. And then the concert begins.

Setlist:

(Outfit - blue tracksuit)
Fit But You Know It
(End part of) Dry Your Eyes

BLUR SECTION:
Girls & Boys
Country House
Parklife

East 17 Medly

Interlude:
Classical interpretation of Mel B's rap from 'If U Can't Dance'

Classic Punk Section:
London Calling
Anarchy In The UK

Abs & 5ive Medly

Kids (rap part only)

Encore:
Rock DJ

We'd sleep out for tickets, truly.

Daniel MANIA

2004-08-16T03:21:00.000-07:00

This belongs over at the Idol Liz I guess, but Daniel has impressed me so much he's going to be a regular 'fixture' here as well.

I mean...shit, where to start.

First of all - the Gabriel thing was fake. So let's forget him. Daniel Appreciation is real, and it's extreme.

I can't believe he got through though. I mean, his performance of Rock DJ was the single most embarrassing moment in Oz Idol history. I couldn't even watch. He got slaughtered for it. But he gets through? WELL DONE AUSTRALIA! And I mean that.

Reasons Daniel Is The Best Idol Contestant Ever:

- The tantrum last night
- When he was sitting next to Barry on the couch tonight and it was between the two of them, he just looked disgusted to be up against him. And I agree - Barry is wack.
- The whole time he was waiting in the 'top 4' you could just tell he was thinking 'Oh shit, I'm going to have to sing Rock DJ again'. Poor guy looked sick to his stomach
- 'Can I please not sing the song I sang last night?'

But he DID. And it was...good. I mean, the English accent was back, and so was the 'rapping', but...in the context that he had actualy made it through by singing that, it was quite...,triumphant almost.

Anyway, I really liked Daniel before the Rock DJ Episode. And, even though it bombed worse than anything, his carry on afterwards was gold. I also love that it was like the judges were proved totally wrong, with him going through. And I'm shocked that the country has taken a tantrum-throwing, bad-rapping clasical singer to heart.

GO DANIEL.

Dogs, Wonderwalls & BEST SONGS EVER - Yes, it's Singles Review Time!

2004-08-15T18:09:00.000-07:00

This week is absolutely amazing for single releases. Do you know how many acts are releasing thier very own personal Wonderwalls? Do you know how many are 5 Dog Classics? Do you know how many are the BEST SONGS EVER?? Well, we're about to tell you.

Alcazar - This Is The World We Live In

I still haven't figured out where the second guy came from. I was actually a fan of Alcazar way back in the day when I was the only person in this ~~goddamn~~, er fantastic Olympically spirited country to buy Crying At The Discoteque. And I thought their cover of Don't You Want Me was 90% as good as the original. But - on to this song! I really wish I didn't call every second song I hear 'song of the year', because this time it's true.

Emma Bunton - Maybe

Well, I first 'reviewed' this almost a year ago. In fact, it came second in last years, Top 40 Songs Of The Year:
1. No Good Advice - Girls Aloud
2. Maybe - Emma Bunton
3. Lost Without You - Delta Goodrem
But, of course, HERE it's released today. I'm completely over it by now, but I still recognise that it's a 5 dog classic.

JC Chasez - All Day Long I Dream About Sex

It really is a Human League song, isn't it?

Darren Hayes - Popular

The inspiration for our new 'design'. Get disc one with the b-side 'Touch' as it is quite extreme.

Millsy - Every Single Day

It's not very good actually.

Maroon 5 - She Will Be Loved

Courtney sang this on Oz Idol, and it was performance of the series for me so far. Maroon 5's 'original' isn't as good, but it's definitely as close as they've come to having a Wonderwall so far.

Lou Reed - Satalite Of Love/Walk On The Wildside 2004

Satalite Of Love is actually my favourite 'olden days' song of all time. Not Walk On The Wildside though, I prefer Marky Mark's version. But, I haven't heard this 'remix' so I didn't purchase it. And hence, I still haven't heard it. But I give the original:

And that is THAT. The most bonza day for single releases ever.

We don't want to keep our feet on the ground

2004-08-15T02:01:00.001-07:00

Isn't the new title banner so much more prettier?

Dear The Colour Pink,
I will never abandon you again,
- Love Crystal G

It's all thanks of course to Chris's Liz-O-Vations:

Because if there's one person who cares about the quality of your Liz or Blog, it's Chris Martin. He's currently Liz-o-Vating Fop and, you might say he's having a bit of Trouble. But, we know Chris will pull through in the end. If you would like your own Liz or Weblog 'Lizovated' send an email!

Now, the question of everyone's lips now is 'Why the Darren Hayes theme?' Well, it's because:
1. Darren Hayes is awesome. He's unfortunatly missed every single one of our Olympic events thanks to ~~us totally forgetting him~~ AN INJURY, but we reckon if he had have been 'fit' he would have won every gold medal there is.
2. 'Popular' is a Five Dog song
3. AND - we are going 'Pop' again, so it fits the theme nicely.

An Actual Aussie Going For Gold Event

2004-08-13T18:13:00.000-07:00

Well, the opening ceremony obviously wasn't as good as the one from the BEST GAMES EVER, but I did think it was quite extreme (extreme means good). Though, I did take note of this statement from one of our commentators when Germany came out:

'They'll be competing with Australia for 4th place, behind the US, Russia and China'.

WE'RE NOT COMPETING FOR FOURTH PLACE! We are going for number one! Nothing less WILL DO.* Australians = Winners.

I mean with a country that produced WOMP, Missy, Stu, Delta, Myself, Pete, Taj, Sky, Kylie and Cameron, just to name a few, it's obvious we don't settle for second best, let alone fourth.

* Note: We actually believe it's all about the Olympic Spirit, and not the winning and the losing at all. But we take offence at the notion that we are aiming for fourth when we are a NATION OF CHAMPS.

Jim Robinson's Saying Of The Day!

2004-08-12T23:29:00.000-07:00

'Gees you talk a lot of of rot'

Said to Paul Robinson, after rot, and a lot of it, was spoken this morning.

(It's just a pity we usually miss Morning Neighbours and this won't be able to be a regular segment. Jim obviously has much to retrospectively teach us in the style of early 90's 'phrases'.)

It's another Aussie 'Going For Gold' Event!

2004-08-12T17:12:00.000-07:00

The next event is - the BEST AUSTRALIAN ALBUM EVER Final!

Representing the nation of 'Neighbours':
'Delta Goodrem - Innocent Eyes'
Representing the nation of 'Neighbours':
'Kylie Minogue - Rhythm Of Love'
Representing the nation of 'Neighbours':
'Natalie Imbruglia - White Lillies Island'
Representing the nation of 'Neighbours':
'Pete Murray - Feeler'
Representing the nation of 'Bright Ideas':
'Girlfriend - Make It Come True'
Representing the nation of 'Neighbours':
'Holly Valance - State Of Mind'

Commentary: Wow, Neighbours sure is well represented in this field! Can Girlfriend pull out something special here and take the gold from the dominant nation? Or will it be a triple haul for the land of Erinsborough? Ooh, and they're off, and they're RACING!

Medal cermony: Neighbours theme song plays.

GOLD: Delta Goodrem - Innocent Eyes
SILVER: Natalie Imbruglia - White Lillies Island
BRONZE: Pete Murray - Feeler

That takes Delta's gold medal tally to 2. Pete is next on the ladder with 2 bronze medals. It's all terribly exciting, isn't it? More thrilling events later on!

I Can't Believe It

2004-08-11T23:22:00.000-07:00

I can't believe he actually used it again. Well, actually it's a slight shake up - I like the 'personal Wonderwall' angle he has chosen to take. But really, I was just shocked and excited when I read it. And Dry Your Eyes...it's the Street's very own personal Wonderwall...who knew?

"Tijuana" - Or, Another Aussie 'Going For Gold' Event!

2004-08-11T03:36:00.000-07:00

It's time for...

The BEST KYLIE SONG EVER Race!

Oooh...competitors, on your marks, get set, GO!

Shocked
One Boy Girl
Your Disco Needs You
Can't Get You Out Of My Head
Finer Feelings
I Should Be So Lucky
Confide In Me
Hand On Your Heart
What Do I Have To Do

And the medals go to:!

GOLD: Hand On Your Heart
SILVER: Finer Feeling
BRONZE: Can't Get You Out Of My Head

Another heart-stopping event!

Doesn't that sound familiar, doesn't that hit too close to home

2004-08-10T17:51:00.000-07:00

I don't care if it's worlds colliding, Scar is too good not to love. It really is the most lovable song of all time, and I guess it can't help being at number one.

For non-aussie readers, we've got an mp3 of Scar for download, so you can also enjoy it.
Missy Higgins - Scar

It will only be up for one day though, because I support the purchasing of all fantastic Missy music, not the downloading.

Here is Cameron Adam's review:

'Staring into stardom, here is Missy's hit. Scar is gorgeous pop, full of life and sporting a healthy swagger. Just like her first acoustic EP (find it now before she's famous and it sells for a fortune) there are other moments of quality here, from the moody Casualty to heart-melting piano ballad Dancing Dirt Into The Snow. And how great it is to hear the Australian accent proudly bursting all over a record.'
4 Dogs

We will have Casualty and Dancing Dirt Into The Snow up as well later in the week.

Missy really is the female Pete Murray though, in every conceivable way. Similarites:

- My original reaction to them both (ie. extreme excitement)
- Cameron Adams support
- Aussie singer-songwriters
- Beloved by The Js
- Touring together

Who else is holding out hope for a Missy/Pete romance? It's a perfect match!

Also, I expect it will be any day now when we hear Scar in the Coffee Shop. Incidentally, there was a new Pete song played at the Scully's last night, My Time. You won't remember this, but Stu recommended they use that in a Stu & The Police/Pop Mechanics With Stu post when he was giving Pete advice on how to save his career. I am glad to see Stu's advice actually being taken and used. You know what road Pete is on now...

An Aussie 'Going For Gold' Event!

2004-08-10T02:54:00.000-07:00

Yes, it's the first event in our Aussie Going For Gold Week, where we are getting into the patriotic spirit and deciding what is the best of the best.

Best Australian Single Ever

Contenders:

Pete Murray - So Beautiful
Kylie Minogue - Hand On Your Heart
Missy Higgins - Scar
Merryl Bainbridge: Mouth
Christina Anu: Party
John Farnham: The Voice
Delta Goodrem: Lost Without You
Shannon Noll: Drive
Motor Ace: Carry On
Bachelor Girl: Buses And Trains
Human Nature: Cruel
Girlfriend: Girl's Life

And the medals go to!:

GOLD: Delta Goodrem - Lost Without You
SILVER: Motor Ace - Carry On
BRONZE:Pete Murray - So Beautiful

What will the next event be? Who will win the entire competition? Delta is in the lead so far!

Well there goes that then.

2004-08-09T16:23:00.000-07:00

Missy Higgins has debuted at number one, which means we have to stop liking her under the conditions of the Murray Principle. It's so rare that a song I like makes number one that the only other time we've had to evoke the conditions of the Murray Act 2004 was, well, when Pete Murray himself made number one.

It doesn't seem right that a BEST SONG EVER has topped the charts...I mean, if I had it my way, next week's top 10 (when all these songs would have been released by) would look like this:

1. Scar - Missy Higgins
2. Keane - Somewhere Only We Know
3. The Darkness - Love Is Only A Feeling
4. Run - Snow Patrol
5. Hard Act To Follow - Grinspoon
6. Laura - Scissor Sisters
7. Maybe - Emma Bunton
8. Popular - Darren Hayes
9. She Will Be Loved - Maroon 5
10. Every Single Day - Millsy

But it's not going to look anything like that, of course, because that's a chart from my parallel universe were people have brains and good taste. BUT - what is strange is that, actually, one of the songs has crossed over from one world to the other, to be number one in both. So before something very terrible happens to all mankind, I must stop liking Missy Higgins at once.

You Mean Stu Had A Life Before He Came Here?

2004-08-08T17:55:00.001-07:00

I was just undertaking my daily listening of Innocent Eyes before and I remembered that at the time of release, there was a bit of a deal made about the fact that the song Not Me Not I was about Blair McDonough.

ie - STU.

Yes - there is a song about Stu. I don't know why I find this so very wierd. It's like when I remember he was on Big Brother, and how much I disliked him at the time. I find it very hard to get my head around the fact that Stu was a whole different person before he moved into second gear.

But that's not even the big issue here. The big issue is how intrinsically linked Delta Goodrem appears to be to the LP and the GF. And how she is, without a shadow of a doubt, our very worst enemy. Let's look at what she has done to some of our friends and heros:

Mark Philippoussis: Ruined tennis career
Stu: Wrote a horrible song about
Taj: Cheated on, broke heart
WOMP: Killed

Where does she get off, exactly?

It's just a pity that we are about to launch Aussie Going For Gold Week, during which not only will Delta feature strongly, but it is also against the rules to diss any Aussies. But just wait till the Olympics are over, Delta.

STOP PRESS

2004-08-07T23:59:00.000-07:00

HOW DID WE NOT KNOW THIS?

Highlight if you want an extreme spoiler:

[[Sky is becoming a lesbian]]

I think. Unless I've got the wrond end of the stick.

Another post about Missy Higgins

2004-08-07T19:59:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I was wrong - Scar IS the BEST SONG EVER. It really is.

I also found this:

'Her music is unadorned and unforgettable... it's why she will open for Pete Murray on his Australian concert dates.'

Of course - Pete only lets artists who's music is unadorned and unforgettable open for him. He has standards to keep up after all.

I am going to have to get to one of those concerts though...Pete, and Missy in the one show? That's all my christmases come at once, plus more.

And any friend of Missy's is a friend of ours, which means...Pete is back in the good books again.

Could You Leave Me With A Scar?

2004-08-07T02:05:00.000-07:00

Young Claire has been hankering for a BEST SONG EVER verdict for her favourite Triple J-winning artist all day, so here it is.

Or...is it? I don't know - it's almost a BEST SONG EVER, this is true. However, it might be more of a SECOND BEST SONG EVER.

Let's weigh up the facts here...

'Scar' Pros and Cons

Pros:

- Has the jauntiest piano vibe ever
- Sung with the aussiest accent this side of Paul Kelly
- Is that a trumpet we hear? If so - excellent!

Cons:

- Jamie Callum has ruined the piano for everyone
- Sounds exactly like the Dawson's Creek theme song
- And I mean exactly.

Hmmm...is it the BEST SONG EVER then? Probably the fact that I even have to ask that question means that it's not.

HOWEVER - On the EP there is the fantastically Oasis-vibed 'Dancing In The Snow' which is a ballad, and yes - it's the BEST SONG EVER! Also, Casuality name-checks me. So, all in all, it's the BEST SINGLE/EP THING EVER.

It's A Brave New World.

2004-08-06T05:31:00.000-07:00

Off The Wall, Faith, Plastic Ono Band, Justified, Funky Dory. Just some of the great first solo projects in music history. Well, today we're witnessing another one. Yes, it's time to live my Life Thru A Lens, to travel down the Open Road and to follow my Northern Star.

I'm a little bit sad though. Not sad to be leaving the Love Pavilion - I was so sick of that place. But I am sad to be leaving my homeboy, Fly Bly M. But remember, you divorce blogs, not blog-mates, and Michael can come always come live here if he wants. I'm quite serious. It will be a slight problem that he is an Albarn, but we can always change that.

What Is The Gallagher Factor, Then?

Well, I'm glad I asked for you.

Here at the Gallagher Factor we (it can be plural because I've adopted Stu) believe:

- ...that there is a Gallagher Factor in everything, if you know where to find it. Whether it's the dad from The OC, myself giving some top advice, or the music of Oasis - it's always there, but to different degrees. Here, we will judge this kind of thing.

- ...that Little James is as good as Live Forever

- ...that Kylie Minogue's hair in Street Fighter should be worshipped

And What Kind Of Stuff Will The Gallagher Factor Be Writing About?

(All these questions, incidentally, have made me realise we should have an F.A.Q. I will get to that as soon as possible)

Coming soon to the GF will be:

- The conclusion of EMAM (Kidding)
- Olympic countdown special event
- Natalie Imbrulia album investigation
- A little bit of politics
- The usual HiT, Rage, Life Mechanics stuff

I'm more than a little bit worried that WOMP is going to show up at some stage. He's like a virus that you just can't kill. Please, trust me, don't EVER start Doubling The WOMP at your own site.

But basically, this will be like a slightly more serious version of the LP. It's quite exciting that I have free-range to do whatever I want now, without anyone disagreeing, but also quite sad. Remember Michael, (and I know you're offline till Wednesday and won't read this anyway...) but you can always come write here if you want. Otherwise, good luck with your own site, we'll always be friends, one day maybe there'll be a reunion, etc.